Wednesday, November 24, 2010

Happy Thanksgiving part #1

I know that today is a busy day for most of us and with that in mind,
I'm going to do something a little different. I'm posting this message
now and then tonight, I plan to post my Thanksgiving Day thoughts
because I know that for some of us, there won't be much time to read
before we're off for the days events (whatever that will be)

and... I'm hoping that it will be of some help as you face the day
tomorrow (if you're struggling or not).

For those of you that are alone or hurting, make sure that you set up
some Thanksgiving Day plans TODAY. Maybe you can get together with
someone else that is alone for the day. Or maybe you could head to a
movie and then to dinner at a restaurant (many are open and serving a
full Thanksgiving meal). Or maybe your idea of a good day is to stay
home and watch a bunch of holiday movies and eat junk food all day.
The important thing is to plan (deliberately) to do something. Don't
just ignore the day. You'll feel much better if the day is made up of
the choices you've made. Even if they're choices that you're stuck
with due to circumstances out of your control. Decide how YOU want to
spend the day and have fun with your choices. Remember too that you
are NOT ALONE! You may feel like it but you're not. I assure you!

Let me tell you about one Thanksgiving that I experienced about 5
years ago.

This was the first year that I was faced with my Thanksgiving
changing (whether I liked it or not).

To say I felt lost would be an understatement. Thanksgiving had
always been one of my favorite holidays so it was particularly painful
that this would be the first tradition in my life that had to change.
I also knew that it was very likely that it would need to be
changed.... forever. I felt terrible. I didn't know where to start
and I didn't really want to either.

So the decision was made that we would start the day with some
wonderful Cinnabons (a holiday treat that we've had for years). This
was good because it was part of our normal tradition. The guest list
had changed a bit but it felt familiar.

The next thing we did was to go to a movie (yes a movie on
Thanksgiving)!

We went to the huge AMC theatre near our house and when we arrived in
the parking lot, a wave of sadness came over me. Here I was at a movie
on Thanksgiving Day instead of with the people that I had spent so
many many big family Thanksgivings with before. All of the hurt and
disbelief rushed through my head. I felt like I was in shock and numb
except for the hurt.

I didn't say anything about how I felt while we were in the car that
day so I don't know if anyone knew that I was feeling bad. So we
walked into the theatre and as we were buying our tickets, I mentioned
to the ticket person that I was sorry that they had to work because of
all of us that didn't have a family to go have dinner with. The
theatre was surprisingly crowded too. She and the guy next to her kind
of laughed and said "don't worry, why do you think we're here? We
wanted to work today for the same reason!" Well that sure took me by
surprise. I looked around at the crowd and suddenly I didn't feel as
bad. We were surrounded with other people that were alone or maybe
hurting too but they were smiling and clearly having a great time. I
realized that I was not the only one in this position and that maybe
it was all gonna be ok after all. The movie was great too!

We went out to dinner later that night and shared the restaurant with
loads of families and singles and that made it feel like Thanksgiving.
AND BONUS...the food was great and I didn't have to cook : )

At about 11:30 that night we went to meet some friends at the big
midnight sale at the outlet mall. Crazy fun! And this year there are
quite a few stores open on Thanksgiving day if you want to get a jump
start on your shopping.

I actually remember this particular Thanksgiving more than most and
not just because it was hard but instead because it had turned out to
be really fun! I had a great day and for some reason, it felt more
like the kind of Thanksgiving that I would pick if I had a choice. And
now I did! It felt relaxing and comfortable!

As I had said in an earlier post, I miss the people that I used to
spend Thanksgiving with but I don't miss the way things were and I'm
truly blessed that I get a chance to make my life what I would like it
to be. On that Thanksgiving Day, I would have never believed that I
could feel happy again but I sincerely do and you will too.

So.... customize this Thanksgiving to fit YOU and you might find
yourself actually enjoying the day (not to mention that it could be
the start of your own Thanksgiving traditions)

I'll be back with Thanksgiving part #2 later tonight.

Love,
Kim

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